Lakshmi Changing

I recently finished reading Sold by Patricia McCormick. I noticed how Lakshmi has changed ever since she moved to the city. Her biggest fears and struggles were lacking food, having her father gamble away money, wanting to work in the city, and the increased sexist rules she has to follow. Even though she was poor and didn't have an easy life she was somewhat happy. Now her fears are getting kicked out on the street, being locked away from home forever, and getting a disease. Unlike the other girls, watching TV can't make her happy. I think that Lakshmi is strong but has changed, pretty much aged into a negative but realistic person. All she wants to do is work so she can finally get home.

One quote that made me think about how Lakshmi has changed is when the tea boy offers her things like sweet cakes. "I sigh and try to remember the time when a sweet cake was enough to make me happy." I think that shows a new Lakshmi, where her favorite treat doesn't matter to her. It also makes me wonder what can make her happy? I think she pretty much lost touch with the world and all she can think about it working to pay her debt.

I think the ugliness of what has happened to her made her pretty much lose herself completely. What stood out to me is even the girls at the Happiness House who get to go out are threatened. When Shahanna tells Lakshmi Monica's kid would be maimed if she tried to run away. "And I consider a world so ugly that child would be maimed for life for an extra rupee or two. And another world full of brides and marigolds, rain machines and white horses." This reminds me of the beginning when Lakshmi thinks the brides, marigolds etc would be in the city. It made me think how unfair it is that you can only live like how Lakshmi expected if you have money.  Another quote when Lakshmi realizes that this 'ugliness' of the world has even reached her. "But I wonder. If the crying of a young girl is the same to me as the bleating of the horns down below, what have I become?" Somebody going through the same as what she did is casual to her- the city has messed with her mind and it's almost like she doesn't even care anymore.

Even though Lakshmi has changed in so many bad ways, I still say she is strong because she has one goal in mind- and she will work for it. There's a difference between losing all connection with the world and letting anything happen then working for what you need. She has all these calculations done, but it frustrates me when Mumtaz says she at least has 5 more years with her! It shows me how bad Lakshmi wants to get out when she says "Any man, every man. I will become Monica. I will do whatever it takes to get out of here." It shows me how she did have to let go in a lot of her beliefs but she learned that she can't avoid breaking her "promise" (to not work for Mumtaz).

I know she hasn't lost all of the Lakshmi we knew since the beginning of the book- because she's still hopeful. Though she's been cheated and lied to, she still has a little bit of trust left in her to let her American save her. I don't know what I could trust if I were her! Lakshmi has changed in so many ways but I still think she's strong and the same person as she was since she left.